Regeneration

Eight years ago as my mom and I waited for a shuttle, we sat next to a few fish tanks lost in the overwhelming news and reality of the moment. My cancer was gone. As relieved as we were to receive the news and be headed back home, the joy was hampered by relief and uncertainty. I was excited to be going home. Living out of a hotel while going through medical tests and surgery is not something I highly recommend. However, more surgery loomed in the future along with the possibility that the cancer could reappear. 

Certain anniversaries since then have held special meaning. Three years in the clear was the first hurdle towards long term remission. Then I made it to five years and all my doctors breathed a sigh of relief. 10 years will mark the final nail in the coffin for medical insurance red tape. So what is special about eight years? 

The number eight in the Bible signifies Resurrection and Regeneration. It is the number of a new beginning. Eight is 7 plus 1 and since it comes just after seven, which itself signifies an end to something, so eight is also associated with the beginning of a new era or that of a new order.

In the past eight years I have graduated college, worked a few jobs, married a pretty cool guy, got a new dog and became a mom. In the last month I made the decision to change my career path and focus on my adventurous toddler and develop my entrepreneurial skills. This is a new place for me. After nearly 7 years as someone’s assistant, I am taking a step towards a new beginning. 

Pursuing opportunity is intimidating when there is more than one option, but never moving forward and embracing risk keeps us in stasis. Life is vastly out of our control, as much as we don’t want to admit or accept that fact. Living intentionally to intercept change and flourish despite of it is the goal. 

Regeneration can be regrowth or reformation and both of those words seem applicable in 2017. As I celebrate remission, I look forward. Whether it was cancer or _____________________, it changes us. Let your blank be your motivation and live to the fullest with what God has given you. 

For Such a Time as This,

Krista

Embrace Opportunity

It’s easy to want to be super mom when you combine holidays, family and children. Doing all the activities, attending all the events, making everyone happy. Even with super human powers, I don’t think it would be possible to do it all. Learning to find the balance between a positive amount of activity and a negative amount of attitude due to expectation is a challenge.

As an introvert it is naturally easier to want to satisfy everyone by saying yes while secretly dying on the inside with the thought of adding one more thing to the calendar. It’s important to learn to say no, which definitely gets easier with kids. Between my dog and my very curious one year old, no gets uttered in a variety of iterations throughout the day. However, it’s also important to not worry so much about the perfect and embrace opportunity. Like when you find your child contentedly eating mini chocolate chips that they have just dumped all over the floor. Sometimes you just have to sit down and appreciate that smiling chocolate covered face.

Tomorrow we take time to remember an imperfect situation. A baby, in a feeding trough, surrounded by the stench of animal stalls and who knows what kind of dirt, pests and insects. I don’t know about you, but as a mom with a newborn that would have freaked me out a bit. Yet, I have a feeling Mary embraced opportunity and chose to treasure the moment by enjoying that little, perfect face.

In the quiet and the chaos, be thankful for the moments and the one who gave us the chance to embrace opportunity.

Merry Christmas

 

You Almost Died!

I love how kids get right to the point, there is no beating around the bush. During one of my niece’s visits, she came through the door with great emotion and announced that she heard the story of how I almost died! Makes my life sound so epic.

This visit came to my mind as I spent time reading loving comments written about a young father who passed away unexpectedly from an infection. I didn’t know him or his family, but I can only imagine the pain. God never told us that life would be fair or easy, but that doesn’t make the unfair moments any easier.

James, Chapter 1 is one of my favorite passages in the Bible. It has so much truth and encouragement packed into one chapter, especially when navigating the tough times.

James 1:2-4 (HCSB) Consider it a great joy, my brothers, whenever you experience various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. But endurance must do its complete work, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing.

As the end of the year approaches and we face stresses and challenges, remember that life is a work. We rise and we overcome – we grow. In order to grow we must face the risks, the pain and the obstacles. I have described cancer as staring death in the face and walking away. When I get to celebrate my growth and smile at the impact of my story, I am thankful for the work being done in me.

In the Quiet

As much as I love my husband and my baby, I am often running on fumes. The thought of sleeping through the night without baby or my mind keeping me up seems as luxurious as a weekend at a 4 star hotel. If the ability to pause time was something I could buy on Amazon I would be ordering an extra large dose so that I could sleep, clean, sleep more and then sit and stare into nothingness with a caramel macchiato.

Every season in life has its challenges and glories that no other point in life will be able to replicate. All too often I find myself comparing this season to other people in my sphere and must remind myself that every journey is unique. No one experiences the same challenges or triumphs exactly as I do, it is the Krista expedition. A special pact between me and God with a few, key supporting characters and a lot of other people that I get to encounter along the way.

In the moments where my temper flairs, my feelings are pulverized, my attitude is a sack of rotten potatoes and the desire to keep moving forward is buried deep in a bowl of Haagen-Dazs double chocolate ice cream, its that still, small voice that gets me back up.

1 Kings 19:11-13 tells a story of the great prophet Elijah.

And he said, Go forth, and stand upon the mount before the Lord. And, behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the Lord; but the Lord was not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; but the Lord was not in the earthquake:

And after the earthquake a fire; but the Lord was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice. And it was so, when Elijah heard it, that he wrapped his face in his mantle, and went out, and stood in the entering in of the cave. And, behold, there came a voice unto him, and said, What doest thou here, Elijah?

Other translations end verse 13 with, what are you doing here? In the midst of life’s chaos, what are you doing here Krista? It takes faith and commitment to survive life’s chaos. I am comforted knowing that God is there through it all, but especially in the quite. He gently directs my heart and confirms that it is all worth it.